Seriously underachieving

The current Government seems to be, almost universally, staffed by a large group of impostors. Are they visitors from another planet, passing themselves off as movers and shakers, decision makers? Have they infiltrated the bodies of the incumbents, but are insufficiently programmed to carry off the deception? Are they all zombies, not alive, but not dead. Whatever the explanation, there is an eerie emptiness about them, as if their batteries are running down.

I watched Question Time recently. Perhaps I am suffering from that, but I did not see anyone who resembled a real member of a real Government. I saw absolute non-entities stand up to ask questions, so phrased as to invite disbelief, using terms, from Government member to fellow Government Minister, like “please explain how and why you are doing such a peerless job for the people of Australia, or your electorate”, and please take your time while you do it, so that the taxpayers of this country can be enraged, disgusted, disenchanted, and generally short-changed by their representatives.

The Ministers duly replied to these gently lobbed love-notes. And what a motley crew they are. And who would have thought that Scott Morrison, who constantly reminds us of the irrelevance of “the Canberra bubble” would sit, firmly front and centre of that self-same bubble, smiling his smug smile, as question after question was wasted, so shamelessly?

The Opposition was fixated on asking all their questions about Angus Taylor, that curiously lucky individual. With such a do-nothing Government, perhaps he is the only action in town. Their questions were all directed at the Prime Minister, who deflected them all, in between taking potshots at the Opposition Leader.

Morrison was ducking and weaving, answering unasked questions, using the inside language of his bubble, with “Mr Speaker” thrown in at every second moment, as if it lends a parliamentary gravitas to his essentially juvenile sneering.

Visit the chamber a day later, and the show has become even more bogged down in mediocrity, like a slow motion train crash. While the planet teeters on the brink of climatic ‘tipping points’ we have a Government found to have been terrorising welfare recipients.

The accusation is that these people might have been overpaid, once upon a long time ago, because the Government was using a possibly illegal, and inaccurate, income assessment tool. Their outrage appears to be real, even as they spend more on pursuing the matter than they will ever recoup.

More than sixty Australian citizens, women and children, victims of their husbands and/or fathers, are stranded in Syria. That is because Peter Dutton, that champion of children everywhere, thinks it is not worth retrieving them, because it would be too dangerous.

These are women and children dragged away, often against their will, to accompany fighters in a war most of them are too young to understand.

Australia’s international reputation is trashed, and our citizens shamed by the inhumanity shown to the refugees, both onshore, and offshore.

But first things first. Ignore real problems confronting Australian citizens to defend to the death the right of Angus Taylor to be Angus Taylor, an entitled twit. Angus is currently being slowly roasted for a totally unnecessary own goal, where he tried to embarrass Clover Moore with a juvenile prank. So he has embarrassed himself and the New South Wales and Federal Police, and most Australians, and probably Oxford University, because he is one of their own.

Which brings us to that well-known political genius, Scott Morrison, who thinks God helped him win the unwinnable election. We are seriously in the hands of idiots! It wasn’t God. It was a combination of your dishonest campaigning, and Bill Shorten.

Let us consider for a moment the fact that the fate of two almost meaningless, certainly small-minded, nasty pieces of legislation, which are before the Senate, are to be decided by Jacquie Lambie, and Pauline Hanson, respectively.

This must be what a mandate looks like, when an elected Government relies on the deciding votes of two such giants of parliamentary excellence. One is left wondering how we got to this terrible situation. I must fall back on my original thesis: Someone has kidnapped the Government, and replaced it with badly programmed robots.

3 thoughts on “Seriously underachieving”

  1. Not underachieving at all. The Liberal Party has its own agenda and is in no way shape or form answerable to or representative of decent Australians. Liberal party song “We have a Mandate” sung to the tune of ‘F### You Australia Fair’.

    Got this in the mail by mistake.


    Please fill in this form as best you can in the limited time available. Those earning more than $250k per annum and making regular generous payments to the Party can ignore questions 2-100, simply fill in your name and hand form to previously supplied lackey.

    Name: (please see drop down box)

    Religion: (believing in an omnipotent being or John Howard are regarded as the same thing for these purposes)

    Age: (maybe important)

    Sex: (given up or in the process of giving up)

    Gender: (If female please attach husband’s permission form)

    Race: White and or Supreme

    White? Y/N (just checking)

    Alcohol Intake: (anything under 25 bottles of a decent red per week will be investigated)

    Lineage: (both parents (blue) blood samples will be tested)

    Ethnic background: Non-Australians do not need to fill in any forms, just rock up.

    School Attended: (If school does not appear in drop down box refer to political donations page or see Labor Party)

    Marital Status: Tick the appropriate box. MARRIED TRADITIONAL (tick)
    NB. There is only one appropriate box.

    Suffrage for Women: Y/N

    Previous Experience: (If the 25 characters is insufficient please attach details. Anything over a paragraph will not be accepted)

    Who do you know/ How well connected: (Please adhere to the 1,000,000 character minimum)

    Do you know or have you ever met John Howard: Y/N (Y please call Jim and welcome to the party)

    Marketing Experience: (recent addition but looked on very favourably)

    Previous Criminal History: (necessary)

    Working with Children:

    Police Check: Please include all police mates regardless of rank.

    Previous Associations:
    Mafia (see above)
    Mining Industry (welcome home)
    Extreme Far Right Political Party (welcome home)
    Pentecostal Church (Welcome home brother)
    Fascist Party need not apply, we will be with you shortly.

    Inter -party transfers: Fascist Party(badge number and welcome if you really have to come now)
    WAEE (whites against everybody else) badge number and welcome.

    For (married) female applicants with good hair and no real ambition please get someone who can read and write to fill in the remaining 500 pages.

    If we have missed any necessary information, that is okay.


    1. Very funny. I hadn’t read it in full till today. Not that I could remember. That’s what cheap sparkling does to the brain. I like it today, might send another reply when I forget this one.


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